Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Turkey...month!! This year our Thanksgiving consisted of several mini-Thanksgivings and one family, fun weekend. Because Amber's homecoming happened on November 11, there were several family members in town so we decided to have an early Southwick family Thanksgiving dinner. Can I just say how extremely grateful I am for my amazing in-laws? From day one, they have opened their arms to me and have always been willing to support us. Each of them has exemplified various qualities and characteristics that I admire and strive to acquire in my own life. We had a fun evening playing games, eating TONS of food, and simply being together.

The following weekend, we held our annual Pie Night. We have done this every year since we've been married. We love inviting family, friends, and neighbors over to enjoy a sugar smorgasbord right before we gorge out on everything else! Each year, we have had fewer attendees, but it is still nice to see those who do come and be able to share our gratitude for them with them.

The next night (Sunday, November 18), we were invited to attend another Thanksgiving feast with my cousins. I grew up sharing nearly every Thanksgiving with this family. Again, we feasted and passed time catching up with each other. It was nice to have Scott, Kaia, and Krystle and her family there too. It felt like a mini-Shumway Thanksgiving even though we were missing those in Arizona.

This year's Thanksgiving weekend was an evolutionary process! Originally, we planned to go to California to spend a weekend together with just the Jeff Southwick family. This is the last Thanksgiving we will spend without any in-laws marrying into our little family. It is weird (and a little sad) to think that next year Dallin will be gone and Amber will most likely be married (that's not the sad part to think about). Our family is changing. In some ways, I'm excited for the changes, but change is also hard. It's slightly disappointing to think that I had such a short time to create traditions with all the kids. It's sad to think that Jonas won't really get to experience growing up with his older siblings in the way they have had the chance to grow up with each other. The little family I pictured having for most of my adult life (until the last 6 years) is quite different from the crazy, messy, utterly perfect reality I have. Just like my crazy, messy family life...this weekend was crazy and messy. Since coming home, Amber started working and was unable to take time off. The vacation rental we reserved back in July canceled on us with only 3 weeks until Thanksgiving. All our plans seemed to be falling through so we counseled together and regrouped. We still decided to spend the weekend as a family, but spend it here. That provided its own complications because everyone had other things come up that drew us apart rather than together (e.g., the boys wanted to go skiing/snowboarding, I helped Krystle move, Jeff had church responsibilities, Amber worked, etc., etc., etc.); however, we successfully planned at least one activity or event each day that allowed us to spend time together. (During some of those events, I was actually extremely grateful we didn't spend more time together! I love my little family, but like I mentioned before, things can get crazy and messy with so many different interests and such an age gap between oldest and youngest.) Wednesday night (21st), Laurin drove down from Ogden to join us for the weekend. Our first family activity was ice skating! This is something all the kids and Jeff enjoy. I just love watching the fun. I have never had enough coordination to stay upright when on skates. It worked out well though because Jonas would skate for awhile then need a break so he'd sit with me and watch the others before hitting the ice again. There were a few comical tumbles as the kids tried different turns and jumps, but no casualties...just a couple bumps and bruises.

The following day (Thursday, November 22nd) we started our day with a delicious breakfast at Cracker Barrel (which may become a new tradition) before going to watch The Grinch. Jonas has been anxiously waiting to see this animated movie. Luckily, the other kids thought it would be fun too. It was actually a pretty cute movie with a great Christmas message. Jonas remained engaged throughout the whole movie.

That evening, we decorated our tree. As much as I love gathering with family to share a feast, I get more excited about Christmas. Jonas has been begging for days to put up the tree. He always tells me he is "so excited" for Christmas. I actually really enjoy putting up our memory tree with all the kids. Each ornament conjures up fun memories from trips taken or milestones in each of our kids' lives. While we were decorating the tree, Jingle (our family elf) dropped off gifts for each of the kids! He just knocked on the door and disappeared before we could catch him. All the kids opened their special ornaments for this year. Laurin got a penny ornament because of how much she has been pinching pennies this year. Amber received a missionary plaque ornament. Dallin's ornament was a map of the US to commemorate our cross country Church history trip. Daniel received a skier and Jonas got a motorbike (because his birthday theme this year was motorbike and he's asking for a new pedal bike from Santa). By the end of the night, we had all our decorations up and one happy little boy!

Another activity that the older kids and Jeff (and even Jonas) have enjoyed has been playing video games literally ALL NIGHT!! Jeff got a new Wii so they could recreate memories of when they conquered Mario Bros years ago. They have had fun arguing, laughing, and conquering.

Friday was a day spent mostly apart. Jeff, Danny, Jonas and I helped Krystle finish moving into her new house. Dallin went snowboarding with friends. Amber went to work and Laurin did some Black Friday shopping (CRAZY!!). However, that evening, we found the time to regroup and experience the magic of Christmas lights at the Festival of Lights in Spanish Fork. Again, Jonas could hardly contain his excitement. He bounced from the front to the back of the car as he looked at all the lights. Afterward, we stopped at our local Fast Gas for the kids to grab some hot chocolate (not my favorite) before driving around Salem Pond's lights then finally on to home.

Saturday (24th) was our last day together. Laurin had to return to Ogden at 3:00 p.m. so we decided to maximize our time in the morning/early afternoon. Unfortunately, Jeff couldn't join us (although he wasn't too disappointed) in the morning because of church responsibilities, but that didn't stop us from having a little fun. The original plan was to go to Provo Beach Resort, but Dallin fell boarding on Friday and tweaked his knee so he asked us to reconsider our plans to do something he felt he could physically manage. (This is where the messy, frustrating parts come in. It's frustrating for me to have made plans that everyone agreed on that suit everyone's needs only to have to try to renegotiate those plans with everyone's emotions and opinions involved (admittedly, including my own)...and of course, everyone's opinion is the best opinion and everyone can't understand why no one else will sacrifice so that he/she can get exactly what he/she wants even though he/she isn't willing to make the same sacrifice. Please tell me I'm not the only mom who experiences this!) This wasn't the boys' first choice, but it was something we could all do as a family, even Jonas. In the end, I think everyone engaged in the activity and will enjoy the end result.

Afterward, Jeff was able to meet up with us to tackle an escape room at Get Out Games in Provo. This was our final activity of the weekend. I wish we could say we ended on a positive note, but even though we escaped, we felt pretty embarrassed at how many little details we missed and how many clues we needed to get out. Oh well! We still had fun and I think the kids would do it again.

That evening, Jeff and I found a little time to escape by ourselves. As we reflected on the pros and cons of the weekend, we decided we would still do it again...just on a smaller scale. It is sometimes frustrating to be all together. As the kids get older, they have more opinions and increasingly diversified interests. It is also hard to try to do something as a family when there is such a wide age gap. It's hard because the older ones have less time for us and the youngest one can't do all the things the older ones can do. It is often frustrating to manage emotions and desires with so many different personalities. It can be messy and crazy. Each one of us feel justified in our opinions and emotions. Each one of us (myself included) can find it difficult at times to view things from others points of views, but, even with all the crazy, messy emotions and opinions, we still love each other. We still make the best of whatever situation we're in and there is no other place we'd rather be than together. We have each other's backs. During this Thanksgiving season, I am thankful for this perfectly imperfect family. I am thankful (although maybe not in the moment) for the frustrating moments of being a part of a family because it makes the joyful moments even more joyful. I am eternally grateful for Jeff. He is often the most grounding individual in the family, at least he keeps me grounded. As our date night came to a close, we agreed that as long as things are good between us, life is good...and thankfully, life is really good!